Sonofabitch! I had a whole post and this stupid thing ate it!
There is a girl, or rather a woman, I suppose who works at the former plant and who continues to text Zack. I will call her Daniella for this Blast From the Past. On the surface if seems fairly innocent. I first saw texts from her when I went through his phone. She was talking about work and then veered off into her plans for the weekend, or maybe the holiday. At the time I was thinking there was no need for her to share that with him, and there was certainly no need for him to encourage her. I believe she mentioned something about going to a bbq and he responded, “Atta girl,” or something similar. I do remember thinking, “Oh hell no! There is no need for this.” But I feel awkward every time I go through his phone, like it’s proof I don’t trust him. I don’t want him to feel badly.
Then today he tells me she sent him a text that starts out, “This place sucks!” And pretty much bitching about how things are being done now. And again I’m thinking, “Oh hell no!” There is simply no reason for this.
The way I see it it’s about boundaries. You set boundaries so you don’t have to worry about seemingly innocent things- words, gestures, text messages- being taken the wrong way and leading to something else. That’s how it usually starts. She talks to him about work, she mentions her plans for the weekend. Oh that sounds like fun. Well, if you hadn’t moved 2000 miles away you could join me. Me? I’m a married man; my wife wouldn’t like that. Oh, I wouldn’t tell. I’m looking for something with no strings attached. And BOOM! He finds himself in divorce court, his kids hate him, and I move back to our old state, or possibly my home state. With the kids. Or, she complains about her personal life, he listens and gives advice, he complains about me, she sympathizes and assures him she would never be like that. They become one another’s confidant and before you know it they believe they’re madly in love and have found their true soul mate.
I suppose he gave me an opening. The next time he mentions Daniella I’m going to tell him I don’t approve. Or more to the point I do not like it. I may even bring it up before he mentions her again.
I think I’m a little bit crazy. I was just imaging our conversation and I went from rational to insane in about 30 seconds. This is my part in my imaginary conversation: Why is she still texting you? (We’re co-workers. It’s just about work.) You don’t work with her anymore. You’re no longer her boss. I’m sure if I had worked with a man out in our old city and he kept texting me you wouldn’t like it. (It’s no big deal. It’s about work!) No, it’s not; I’ve seen those texts. You were asking her about her weekend. Telling her Atta girl when she told you what she was up to. It’s none of your business what she does in her free time. Why do you even care? Hey, I’ve got an idea since you’re so concerned about her. Why don’t you get her a job at the plant out here and that way you can see her and watch over her every single day. Then you can start fucking her and then you can divorce my ass and you can listen to your precious little Daniella tell you all about every fucking move she makes every fucking second of the day!” See? I told you I was crazy.
One thought on “Was This Another Sexting Buddy?”
This is a hard situation.