A Huge Pity Party Mystery Update

I’m going to be honest. There is no “huge pity party mystery update.” There is, however, a pity party going on (when isn’t there one going on when it comes to CF?), a mystery that has been solved, and an update. I needed to consolidate my title. Instead of A Huge Pity Party, a Mystery Solved, and an Update I mashed it together. Catchy, huh?

First, the update. Picasso finally got his Christmas card and gift card. CF came through and wasn’t a total dickhead to his son. Why it got here so much later than Rock Star’s is a mystery I won’t try to untangle.

Second, the mystery solved. Tammy Faye and Pastor Fake sent the kids a little something for Christmas as well. Tammy Faye went on to say that she hadn’t been well and they had moved into a handicap apartment. I’m not sure how that differs from their previous apartment seeing as how it was a single floor with 2 bedrooms. Maybe the bathroom is more handicap friendly. I don’t know; I don’t care. For shits and giggles I checked the return address on the card. What do you know? The address is the same one CF used as his return address.

Again I ask why? What is the big deal with using his correct address? Does he think I don’t know her address? Does he think he’s somehow keeping his location a big secret from me because I don’t deserve to know where my husband is living? Surprise! I know her address. It was listed in the actual court documents when I named the whore in our divorce proceedings.

Does he think that if he doesn’t list her address then his kids might be fooled into thinking that he’s not living with her or isn’t still with her? Um… it might help if you took down the picture of you posing with the bitch as your FB profile picture. Otherwise, this just looks desperate and sad.

Speaking of desperate and sad, here comes the third part- the huge pity party. What else is new, right? I told you the house is being sold at a foreclosure sale. My cousin is interested in buying the house for her daughter but doesn’t think she’ll have the funds. She contacted CF to ask him how much was owed on the house. He responds: My kids won’t talk to me, I’m bankrupt, and I’m on all these medications. But that’s not your problem….

Now granted, I don’t have this word for word but I’m sure it’s very close. Hell, maybe she did make an offhand comment about “hope you’re doing well” or “sorry to hear about the house.” Ultimately though she was inquiring about how much was owed. And his response is to pour out all his problems- TO MY DAMN COUSIN! Maybe he’s hoping to sleep with her as well. Maybe it’s not enough to sleep with his own cousin; maybe he’s hoping to sleep with my cousin, too. Maybe he has a cousin fetish.

He is ALWAYS THE VICTIM! His kids won’t talk to him, he’s on various medications, and he’s bankrupt. Don’t you feel sorry for him? I’m a kind hearted person. Normally, I would feel sorry for someone like this. Until I realized that he DROVE THE DAMN BUS RIGHT OFF THE CLIFF himself!

I told him back in 2013 that Rock Star would hate Harley and that she would never accept her kids. I told him this point blank. There was no beating around the bush, no euphemisms, no hesitation whatsoever. Rock Star will hate her! Plain as day. I know my daughter. I have been a little surprised about her willingness to stay in contact with him and her apparent dismay at not having a father in her life, but I think that may be simply due to the fact that he’s abandoned them which is always a tough pill to swallow whether you want that person in your life or not.

He knew that if he ever left he was risking his relationship with his kids. He said himself that he told Harley the kids were much closer to me than to him. He admitted to me when I told him Rock Star would hate Harley that he figured as much. When I told him there would be no fucked up version of the Brady Bunch between her kids and mine he agreed.

All that notwithstanding, what the hell did he think was going to happen when he moved them across the country, torpedoed their lives for this new job of his, and then turned around and upended their lives again a year later? Did he think they were going to thank him? What did he think was going to happen when he left every weekend to go be with Harley and her kids? When he could socialize with them and play Daddy of the Year to them but couldn’t be bothered with his own children? How did he think they were going to react when he moved out of the house and out of the state without bothering to even mention it to them, much less say goodbye?

As a small aside Rock Star informed me that he sent her a FB friend request. She ignored it. She said she wasn’t going to decline it because then he would have something to play victim about.

The last time Picasso mentioned his dad he called him a cock. That boy is stone cold. I would not ever want to get on his bad side.

He’s heavily medicated? Fucking your cousin will do that to a person. Maybe stop doing that and you’ll feel better. I don’t know what to tell you, dude. You’ve made some bad life choices. Sounds like those choices are coming home to roost and you’re dealing with the consequences. Sucks to be you.

You know what else? I don’t really care, not even little bit, about your mental health now. I don’t give a shit if you’re trying to get better now. Now for another woman and her kids. I needed you to get better before. I needed you to get better so that you could be a husband and a partner to me. I don’t care how you’re doing for her. I hope you’re doing awful, quite honestly. I needed you to get better so that you could be a decent father to our own children. I don’t care one little bit how you treat hers. I cared about you getting better when it would affect our family for the better. Now that you’ve chosen her and her brood I don’t care if you ever get better. I hope you don’t. Let her deal with the fallout for the next twenty years.

He’s bankrupt? Wow- who would have ever seen that one coming? Again, you’ve made some bad life choices. You walked away from a house you’d owned less than a year. You watched them put an insanely expensive inground pool in your backyard, knowing you were going to leave your family for a whore and her kids. You furnished almost your entire house with new furniture. Maybe it was the fact that you had a brand new pussy wagging in your face that kept you distracted but all of those things- the new house, new pool, new car, new furniture- were some of the very first things I thought about when I found out you were cheating again. How the hell would we be able to sell the house and not lose our asses? That was a huge concern of mine. Again, I’m sure you were much more focused on fucking your cousin than on worrying about what was going to happen when we tried to sell a house that we had been paying on less than a year.

You had a wife of twenty years who had followed you around the country and been a stay at home mom since your daughter was an infant. How did you not seeing spousal support coming? Again, that’s another one of those things I tackled straight out of the gate. What can I expect to receive in child and spousal support and how do they calculate that shit? I know; I know. When a whore is sucking your dick you don’t give much thought to those sorts of things. It will all work itself out and besides, hey, you’re getting a blow job!

You had a pool loan and credit card debt. Oh, that was another thing I checked on- how spousal debt was split up. Guess you were busy getting busy with the whore and didn’t inquire. You gave your wife less than $5000/month and expected her to pay all of the bills out of that, including the $2100/month mortgage, the car payment for her new car, the car insurance for both of you, both credit cards, all the utilities, and a $341/month pool loan. There wasn’t enough left over after paying all the bills for her to buy groceries or dog food but instead of giving her more you just told her to use the money she had put aside. You know, the money that was earmarked to pay off the pool. Instead of splitting the household expenses which would have meant your wife didn’t have to use the pool money, which in turn meant that you wouldn’t have had to pay an additional $15,000 out of your bonus check to pay off the remainder of the pool, you chose to put your remaining paycheck, almost $5000/month, into a separate checking account that you shared with the whore. I did warn you that it would be considered a marital debt and that it would have to be paid off. You did screw me, however, seeing as how you got to pay the remainder from your bonus check and then split the proceeds with me, instead of having to split the bonus check and then you paying the rest of it off. Of course, if you did have an additional $7500 the whore would have just blown through it. But, I would possibly be in a better situation with an extra $7500. Oh what am I saying? You don’t give a shit about me and your kids and how we’re struggling.

You took a $5000 loan out against your 401k, and even knowing that it needed to be paid off before you left the company or penalties would apply, you quit your job of 15 years. You cashed in all of the remaining stock you had been given and in quitting 6 months later, you walked away from tens of thousands in unvested stocks.

In four months she (or the two of you) went through approximately $30,000. You bought such necessary items as a $4200 engagement ring, a $300 formal dress for a child that wasn’t yours, over $400 in sports equipment (just in September), almost $200 at Vera Bradley, hundreds in eye care, almost $1000 paying the whore’s utilities, and over $800 for Christmas gifts for children that weren’t yours. Between January and June you took in approximately $27,000 after paying your court ordered support and according to your bank records there was only $3000 in your account at the end of June. Of course, Harley was contributing right around $5000/month, too so I’m not sure we should even say YOU had $3000 left over. Between you two idiots you had $3000 left over and that’s only because you didn’t pay a dime in support that month. You should have had nothing left once support was paid but I guess Harley wouldn’t have been able to spend to her little heart’s desire had you paid half of your support that month. It was much more important that she get whatever she and her kids wanted, rather than you provide anything your kids might need.

I have to give a shout out to Totally Caroline because she definitely saw this one coming. I really thought he’d keep it together at least until Harley dumped him. He likes having money. He likes being a big shot. More importantly, she likes having money and what he was handing over to her was easily doubling her income. Even once he began paying court ordered support he was still able to offer her around $3000/month.

I have to just shake my head in amazement. He wants everyone to see him as a victim and yet he is completely unable to comprehend that he went down this path willingly. Did it play out the way he expected? Oh, probably not. I’m sure he thought he was going to pay me a lousy $5000/month and get to walk away from all of our joint responsibilities. I would pay all the bills, take care of the kids, the pets, and go get a full time job working for peanuts to pay for groceries, gas, household staples, and any other extras. Meanwhile, he would have $5000 to blow on absolutely nothing. It would all be fun money. If you recall he had no bills. His car was paid for, his cell phone bill was paid for by his company (until he quit), and I paid the insurance on his car. Ooh, lightbulb moment! That is probably what he thought would happen and why he sees himself as my hapless victim. It doesn’t matter that he did this to himself. It doesn’t matter that he miscalculated screwing me in that particular way. No, the only thing that matters to him is that things didn’t work out the way he thought they were going to so now he’s a victim.

Take heart, Cousinfucker. Every time you begin to whine about all the medication, the financial disaster, and the fact that your kids will have nothing to do with you you can take comfort in the fact that Harley is right there by your side, probably down on her knees. How can you possibly be unhappy when you have your soul mate, the person who makes you happy, by your side forever? Victim? Oh gosh no! I’d say you’re the victor!

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3 thoughts on “A Huge Pity Party Mystery Update

  1. You write like there’s no tomorrow! I think you need to consider writing as a way of generating income. 100 words in, and I’m struggling. You do a 1000 before you take your first breath! I’m serious! Consider it!

    Like

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