Today

Today I am all over the place. I’m beginning to think I’m bipolar. Maybe I’m just crazy. I warn people about that but they never believe me. I must have an honest face.

I was having a good day. And then I wasn’t. Still no check from Cousinfucker. Do you know how many times I wish I were him? I could do whatever the hell I want and suffer no repercussions. Part of that is undoubtedly due to the fact that I wouldn’t have a conscience. Life is good as a sociopath.

I texted him to let him know that I hadn’t received the support check yet this month. He hasn’t replied yet. I don’t know if it’s because he’s ignoring me, or if he and the fake family are out on some fabulous vacation for the fake daughter’s graduation. 50/50 odds.

I HATE having to text him. I HATE getting an upset stomach every time I know I’m going to have to communicate with him because he’s usually such an ass to me. To me! I didn’t do anything! He cheated on me. The way he acts you’d think I’d been fucking every guy around for the last 20 years. I hate the fact that communicating with him makes me a nervous wreck. I want to look that piece of shit in the eyes and tell him to bring it on. I want to be strong and mighty. I hate feeling like a wimp when it comes to him.

I did it, though. I just keep telling myself to stop being a whiny little pussy and fight for what I want. I tell myself that my kids deserve better than what he’s delivering.

Rock Star just had a birthday. No gift from Daddy Dearest although I hear he’s been posting old pictures of them on his FB page. I’m sure someone wiser than him pointed out that it wouldn’t do him any favors to have a FB page full of pictures of his fake kids while he ignored his own.

As I said above the whore’s daughter graduated from high school (or will be soon). I’m sure he couldn’t pay his support for his actual children so that his fake daughter, that he’s not that close to, could have an amazing graduation party and he could in turn help pay for an extravagant graduation gift. Nicely done, Dad!

September is never going to get here. I’m going to end up being married to this asshole for the rest of my life.

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2 thoughts on “Today

  1. Can you be funny in the texts to gain back some of your power? Like, “I didn’t realize ptsd affected memory so much. You nearly forgot to send me my check. I’ll look forward to it this week.” Or just a simple “It’s time for my check asshole!”

    Liked by 1 person

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