The Money Game

I absolutely hate communicating with CF in any way. As expected the first bi-weekly payment didn’t arrive by Wednesday (the 17th). I’m tired of being passive about his non-payment so I texted. I wasn’t nearly as wordy as I originally thought I was going to have to be. I simply let him know I hadn’t received the check yet. Oh, I prefaced it with the reminder he had asked to pay bi-weekly and I agreed. I also acknowledged I didn’t know which Friday he was actually paid but regardless he had had enough time to send me the support check.

Oh my! You would have thought I’d been hounding him for months. He told me to “check [my] damn mailbox” and concluded with, “Greedy much.”

Yes, that’s me. Greedy ’til the very end. Actually expecting him to keep current on his support obligations? What a bitch! I guess since he finally sent his arrears he figured he didn’t need to pay again for a few months.

He proceeded to inform me that he had no idea why I didn’t have it, it wasn’t his fault if the post office didn’t get the mail to me on time and then let me know he hadn’t received proof that I had health insurance on the kids. That would be nice to see as well, he wrote.

Hmmmm… maybe I didn’t have it yet because he had mailed it the day before I sent the text! And had the audacity to act as though I was being unreasonable in reminding him.

I’m also going to disagree that it’s not his fault. Obviously, if you get paid on Friday and don’t bother to send a check until Tuesday it’s your fault the payee hasn’t gotten paid yet. Furthermore, even accepting his lame lie that he sent it on time, it may not be his *fault* I haven’t received the check but it certainly is his *problem*. I’m not sure how likely the judge is to believe the check just takes a really long time to get to me every month.

As for the snark about the proof of insurance- that was never required. Ask nicely and I will probably be willing to show you proof. Be an asshole and you can go fuck yourself. Guess which category he’s in?

He concludes his little rant with the following: You will have your “well deserved” funds in plenty of time before the month end. Don’t stress yourself out.

What a condescending little twat waffle! Yes, I’m “stressing myself out” by reminding him he owes me money and I haven’t received it.

I am a little curious about the quotation marks around well deserved. I’m wondering if that’s a clue he’s been hacking into yet another area of my life. I’m not sure I’ve ever described support as “well deserved” but perhaps I have. Or perhaps someone close to me did and that’s his little way of letting me know he’s everywhere.

Would you like to know how this story ends? I checked the mailbox that day at lunch (I sent the text on Wednesday and he didn’t reply until Thursday) and lo and behold there was a check! For $902.91- half of child support. No new images on the envelope. A few days later I get another check. This one was for $1400- half of spousal support. I must tell you he wrote on the memo line: Court ordered alimony. He must really resent that. This envelope had the same picture as the last alimony check.



Does anyone out there in the blogosphere knows what the hell it means?

I just found out he sent yet another check for the other half of child support. I guess I’ll get the last $1400 on the last day of the month. So much for, “You will have your ‘well deserved’ funds in plenty of time before the month end.”

Is it just me or is he playing games? The judge orders him to pay in full on the 1st of the month. He has his lawyer ask me/my lawyer to allow him to pay bi-weekly because that’s how he gets paid. I agree to this. He then proceeds to pay me whenever he feels like (I still don’t know if he got paid on the 5th or the 12th). Instead of paying me the slightly less than half amount he asked to pay, he instead pays me the full half of child support. Days later he sends me the full half of spousal support, and another week or so later sends me the second half of child support, paying it in full.

Why even bother asking if he can pay it bi-weekly (remember this will be smaller payments every other week instead of the lump sum) if he’s just going to pay the full amount? My mom thinks it’s all about power. He wants to continue to play games and show everyone that no one is the boss of him. He’ll pay when and what he wants.

I know what everyone is thinking: Garnish his wages! I’ll tell all of you exactly what I told my mom and my brother. I don’t give a shit how he pays me so long as I’m paid in full each month. If he wants to think he’s driving me crazy by not paying until the second half of the month I’ll let him. No sweat off my back. He’d better not be late though because once the last day of the month rolls around with no check I’m going straight to whomever to get that shit garnished. One bounced check? One stopped payment? Garnishment.

Hell, this way he’s actually paying me the full amount. I also know that if I garnish his wages I won’t get as much as I’m getting when he pays me. Plus, I’m always waiting to see what new and fun designs he has for me on my envelopes. It makes my day!

Update: I got the second half of my alimony today! And there were no new images on the check. In fact, there was nothing on the check except my name. The memo line read simply: Alimony.

I wonder if he’s finally tired of playing games. Or maybe he’s given up trying to get a reaction out of me. Perhaps he is finally resigned to his fate.

Mark your calendars, folks. This is two months in a row that he has paid in full. That hasn’t happened since before he lost his job.

11 thoughts on “The Money Game

  1. I think the image is a reference to the Julian laws on adultery. IIRC, Emporer Augustus made adultery illegal which allowed for a husband to kill the wife’s lover, among other things. The woman depicted is Agustus’s daughter, who broke the law and was exiled.

    You probably want to look that up to be sure. High school was a long time ago.


      1. Oh, Shameless, he lives in his own little world. Your mistake is in thinking he is a rational person. 😉 According to him I am doing the exact same thing. I am engaged in an adulterous relationship!!!! Don’t you realize that him lying to me, cheating on me, giving his whore money while he lied and cheated on me, and moving out and abandoning his kids is EXACTLY the same as me dating my mobster? I’m also the other woman even though the mobster’s wife was cheating on him and had moved out of the house and in with her boyfriend before I ever met him. I’m the other woman even though he had already started getting the ol’ divorce ball rolling. What I did is EXACTLY the same as Harley taking money from my husband and sleeping with him when I had no idea. CF is ALWAYS the victim! Don’t try to take that away from him or he’ll banish you from his Facebook life!

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah, now that would make sense! I did google the saying and found out who she was but I kept focusing on the “married to her cousin/allegedly had an affair with her uncle” part. I knew he wasn’t broadcasting his own faults so I couldn’t figure out how I played into this. I was the Grinch and the greedy bank robber, but I certainly was not sleeping with any relatives! So this definitely makes sense especially seeing as how I received the first one right around the same time he was busy telling Rock Star I had “done the same thing”.


      Liked by 1 person

  2. Do you have Informed Delivery through the US Post Office? It allows you to see a scanned image of mail coming to your address the day of delivery. Since mine doesn’t arrive until about 5 each day I can check it at 8 am and see everything (except catalogs and magazines) coming, including packages. You can also get an email sent to you of the scanned images. it is incredibly handy and you do it on their website.


  3. Sorry to be commenting on an older post; I worked my way back to this one from the link you provided on your current post. I’m the opposite of CF in that I pay in full alimony to my ex on the first of every month like clockwork.

    What struck a chord for me about this post is that he actually snail mails you the checks. Have you ever discussed electronic payments with him? My ex used to switch banks and credits cards at such a dizzying rate that it drove me crazy during our marriage. Once alimony started, I encouraged her to open an account with the same bank I use so that she’d get the funds on the exact same day that I transfer them to her. She grudgingly did it, but has asked me three times if I’d be willing to switch banks because she’s “bored” with this particular one. That sent chills up my spine with bad memories. I said no, and she’s had to suffer with having to stay with the same bank now all this time. 🙂

    I’m very sorry for your and your children’s awful odyssey. You seem to have maintained your dignity, though, and that’s something about which you should feel proud. – Marty


    1. Hi there! Comment away on old posts. I don’t mind. I always get notified so it won’t be overlooked.

      This was back in January. He bounced a check at the end of February and switched over to Zelle. Now we’re doing Venmo. It’s so much easier, although he still pays whenever he’d like. At least I don’t have to worry about whether or not the check is good. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

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