Poor Little OW

I came across the comments section of an OW’s blog. Shocker- she was alone on Valentine’s Day and hoping for a shout out from her married man. Another OW tells her, “I feel for you. I really do… The other woman rarely gets any sympathy and I think that is unfair. It’s impossible to stop loving someone even if you are not ‘meant’ to.”

In reply, the OOW (original other woman) says, “Thanks… it’s great to have someone who relates. Definitely unfair, and so hurtful. Our feelings are not important at all!!!???”

Are you two dipshits for real? Do you really not understand why people might not feel sorry for you when you’re off fucking married men and helping to destroy families?

I’ll bite. What exactly is it that we’re supposed to feel sorry for?

Sorry that your married man is spending holidays with his wife? Hmmmm… that’s what commonly happens when you get involved with a married man. He tends to spend the holidays with his actual wife and family, especially if you are a dirty little secret, hidden from everyone he knows.

Are we supposed to feel sorry for you that you “fell in love” with someone who was already taken? Hmmmm… I personally believe that you can control that shit. You get the crotch tingles from someone and you find out he’s married? You walk away! Period. Take up knitting. Bake some banana bread. Read to orphans. Milk a goat. You don’t engage because chances are excellent that this is not going to end well.

I’m so tired of hearing this tripe. You can’t control who you fall in love with. You can’t stop loving someone even if you’re not meant to love them. Bullshit! You don’t put yourself in situations where this could happen. If you are attracted to a man who is married you avoid that person. If you can’t avoid him for whatever reason (and truthfully, I think that’s going to be a rare situation) you make sure you’re not alone with him. You don’t socialize outside of work with him. You don’t email him. You don’t text him. You don’t friend him on Facebook or follow him on Instagram. You don’t FaceTime. You stay off his Twitter account. You don’t SnapChat. You. Walk. Away.

I’ll take it one step further. Maybe you can’t control who you fall in love with. Maybe you can’t stop loving someone even if you’re not meant to love them. You can, however, choose how to behave going forward. You can choose to stay away. You can choose to not act on those feelings. You can choose to acknowledge that it is wrong and that a relationship between the two of you will hurt people, so you again, opt to walk away.

Sorry, sweetie pie; you are absolutely correct when you say the other woman doesn’t get any sympathy. There is a reason for that. She chose this. She knew what she was doing; she knew she was wrong and she went ahead anyway. Either she believed it was a love fated in the stars, or she believed she was so damn special she was entitled to another woman’s mate. Regardless, she chose her lot in life.

Now she and her other women friends can sit around a fireplace, drowning their sorrows in alcohol as they bemoan the fact that their married lovers have left them alone yet again over holidays, or cry as they realize the love of their life is still having sex with his wife. Maybe they can pour over pictures of the couple on social media and try to figure out if he’s really happy with her or if it’s all a charade, because gosh darn it, it just looks so real and he never takes the OW on vacation or buys her expensive presents!

If you want people to acknowledge your feelings and to sympathize with you when you are hurt stop fucking married men. It’s almost impossible to pity a woman who knowingly takes on that role.

11 thoughts on “Poor Little OW

  1. I’m a “member” of one of those locked sites. I contribute fiction once in a while so I don’t get banned. Their world involves them and their married penis. Nothing else. The hatred for the wife is palpable. They KNOW exactly what goes on in the marriage. They KNOW their guy is dying to leave but the bitch wife is forcing him to stay. It’s coconuts for sure. They hang on for years. They are the victims. My cheater didn’t leave, but I’ll tell you one thing – nothing I did would have made him stay if he wanted to go. Nothing. Legally, morally, heartstring-y, nothing. Nothing.

    It’s my guilty pleasure to go on the sites because it reminds me that the ow has the worst outcome, she has to live her life as her, and holy shit, that’s punishment. They lie to their mm, the mm lies to them (but it’s ok because it’s due to the special nature of an affair, so he’s lying because he wants this affair to work so badly because love – seriously, they write that shit) and everyone in the world knows that one secret or lie puts the first crack in a relationship. They spin shit like crazy, always ending with “but he had to because he loves me and I signed up for this because I know he’s my soulmate, so being alone while he and wife tour Europe for 5 weeks is ok because they don’t have sex, he rejects her then texts me to tell me.”

    I remember wh going to the toilet in the morning with his phone and him texting (I discovered later). “Hey” to her at 5am. In less than 5 seconds while he was shitting she believed she was the first thing he thought of when he woke up, and ensured a blow job later. It’s like teens counting “likes” on social media. It takes a second to press the button, it doesn’t mean you’re special to 400 people. The point was he got a level 10 effort out of her, and all he needed to do was level one, killing time on the shitter. Who wants that relationship?

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I’m a member of the same locked group. I don’t go on often, but do find myself there once in a while.

    I go for the same reason, to see how miserable they all are. It makes no sense.

    Oh, and they all think they are the love of his life…. and I agree with lemon drop, most are holding down their “relationships” with the OW on the shitter.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m also fascinated by the married ow who aren’t leaving their own marriages but get hung up on the betrayed wife. They are such small, selfish twats. Wh’s Ow thought she was going to replace me, but a cheater will take any available wet hole. He said the most desirable thing about her was that she was willing to fuck him and drop everything after a one word text. Not her beauty (🤢🤮), not her brain 🤪, not her kind character (she was married with 4 kids and a serial cheater). Just her wet hole(s), because in the dark, that’s all that mattered. I showed him the door and he was terrified she’d find out he’d been kicked out because he didn’t want to be with her. Yet, apparently I chained him to a radiator and swore he’d never see the kids again and he would love me, dammit. Sorry for the rant, the Supreme Court stuff has been triggery for me – my wh is actually being a peach.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I hope this comment isn’t OTT but women (or men) saying they are having an affair with a married man (or woman) because “they can’t help who they fall in love with” is akin to the horrible “boys will be boys” to excuse sexual harassment/assault. I accept that sometimes you can’t help the feelings you have about another person (romantic, loving, sexual, whatever) but everyone must take responsibility for their actions and how they behave with those feelings. It is okay to have feelings about someone who is married. It is most emphatically not okay to act on those feelings.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Oh Geeze, no doubt! I actually took an evening to read the blogs of these poor, OW, these poor broken hearted. It was a huge mistake. HUGE.

    This woman smugly wrote about the fact she could not help it if is Wife was not into sex. No, she proudly claimed that if “wifey” would open her legs once in a while, perhaps he wouldn’t wander. If she cleaned or cooked, maybe he wouldn’t find another woman, like her. Maybe, if “wifey” would pay attention to him, He wouldn’t seek out someone else.

    I so wanted to tell her that SHE was the dumb ass. SHE, was the one falling for the lie. BEcause “wifey” was doing everything he claimed she was not.

    In fact, “wifey” probably had no idea she was a slob, didn’t cook, or paid too much attention to the children. In fact, Hubby was a liar, feeding her lines so he could get exciting sex from a dumb ass, other woman.

    But, I moved on, I moved on to another, OW blog. It read about the same.

    Liked by 1 person

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