My Mom Made Me Write This

My mother has a problem with me calling Harley’s kids “mulligans”. They are innocent children, she tells me. They have done nothing. It is not their fault their mother is a whore. She wants me to stop calling them mulligans. She thinks it’s derogatory. Actually, she thought it was synonymous with hooligan.

In response I told her that calling them mulligans had nothing to do with them personally; it has to do with what they represent to CF. I’m not using the term to insult them; I’m using it to throw shade at him.

Mulligan- a second chance to perform an action, usually after the first chance went wrong through bad luck or blunder.

…when a player gets a second chance to perform a certain move or action.

A do-over.

The term is now widely used to describe any “do-over” or second chance after initial failure.

I don’t refer to them as such to be cruel. They represent CF’s second chance, his “do over”, if you will. He gets to pretend like his first two children don’t exist. He gets to pretend like he’s daddy of the year. I’m using a term to describe what they are to him.

Perhaps it is cruel. I prefer to think of it as flippant. “Hey! How are those replacement kids working out for ya, CF?” Mulligan is easier to type. 

But to appease my mother I will do my best to not refer to them as such. They are, after all, innocent children who have a whore for a mother and have to live with CF. They’ve got enough on their plate.

3 thoughts on “My Mom Made Me Write This

  1. Being a golfer, I understood your intent. It really is more a dig at the ex. It’s also better than calling the kids “Harley’s Innocent Victims”, or HIV for short!!

    Like

  2. What’s wrong with me, that always cracked me up 😆
    (Your record is good with me, intention is everything and that word is perfect. I don’t think it’s fun for you to use it, as a mother I know it hurts deeply, SweetSam)XO

    Liked by 1 person

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