I found this funny. When I interviewed for the job one of the things my new potential boss said to me was that I seemed like a really happy, upbeat person. He was wondering if I would want a job where I’m dealing with complaining customers all the time.
What can I say? I’m a phenomenal actress. Plus, this was an interview. You typically put your best foot forward and don’t talk about the many days you are crying in your office because your boyfriend dumped you, or how your dad died recently. Some things are not discussed.
One of my co-workers and I laughed about it. Yeah, I am not a perpetually happy person, especially not these last few months. It’s been hell. But I was taught you put a smile on your face, get your ass to work, and you fake it while you’re there. Nobody knew what the hell I was going through when I was in the middle of my divorce and I don’t think many people know what I’m going through now.
Obviously my co-workers all knew my dad died, and they know about the breakup. But I’m pretty sure none of them would say I was a basket case, which again, is testament to my phenomenal acting.
It’s getting better. I’m going to have to move on to Phase 2. That might take a little more doing but I am hoping it will yield great results. I still spend way too much time thinking about him and what I’d love to be able to say to him. I need to train my mind to think about something else each and every time that happens.
I’m pretty sure that’s what I ended up doing the summer that Dick dumped me for Sweet J. After a certain point any time I thought of either of them I would just tell myself, “Nope. Think of something else.”
Anyway, I thought that was kind of funny. I’ve had probably one of the worst starts to my year ever and I’m told I seem like a really happy person.
I did not win best actress in high school for nothing.
2 thoughts on “I Seem Like a Really Happy Person”
For a while I used the word action.
Whenever I started ruminating about Craig, etc I would say ACTION out loud. It meant, focus on what is in front of you. This is reality.
It worked quite well.
Thank you. I might try that. Just telling myself no and refocusing helped the last time but I’ll give this a try.
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